When I was born as a baby girl on the Earth, my human mind was not aware of anything other than the physical sensations I was seeing, hearing, and feeling. I had no context with which to interpret these sensations, no framework, no relational data that could come together to tell me what I was, where I was, who I was. Through the days and months and years of my life as a human, I began to relate my experiences into an identity. I became a person, with a personality and a fully formed and active ego.
But, that was not really who I am. I soon learned that being a human was painful, and quite often an unhappy experience. To top it all off, the experience inevitably ends in death. But then I learned that God exists, and that I was not who I thought I was. I searched for answers, and eventually I found A Course in Miracles (ACIM). After reading the Text and doing the Workbook lessons I began to understand that awakening experiences begin in the ego thought system, because that was where the idea of the dream was made and the only place where it resides. Jesus tells us in ACIM:
T-3.IV.2. Consciousness, the level of perception, was the first split introduced into the mind after the separation, making the mind a perceiver rather than a creator. 2 Consciousness is correctly identified as the domain of the ego. 3 The ego is a wrong-minded attempt to perceive yourself as you wish to be, rather than as you are. 4 Yet you can know yourself only as you are, because that is all you can be sure of. 5 Everything else is open to question.
So – I can only know myself as I truly am. Who is that? Jesus tells me in ACIM that I am God’s Son, perfect and innocent, filled with the Spirit of the Christ.
W-pII.6.1. Christ is God’s Son as He created Him. 2 He is the Self we share, uniting us with one another, and with God as well. 3 He is the Thought which still abides within the Mind that is His Source. 4 He has not left His holy home, nor lost the innocence in which He was created. 5 He abides unchanged forever in the Mind of God.
W-pII.6.2. Christ is the link that keeps you one with God, and guarantees that separation is no more than an illusion of despair, for hope forever will abide in Him. 2 Your mind is part of His, and His of yours. 3 He is the part in which God’s Answer lies; where all decisions are already made, and dreams are over. 4 He remains untouched by anything the body’s eyes perceive. 5 For though in Him His Father placed the means for your salvation, yet does He remain the Self Who, like His Father, knows no sin.
How do I reconcile the wrong minded me who believes I am the ego, with the right minded being who is God’s Perfect Son? It is a process – a process that begins when I realize that I am not who I believe myself to be, and ends when I wake up to my own Truth. Does that take a lifetime? Do I have to pray and meditate and do good deeds to make it happen?
ACIM tells me that all it takes is a little willingness. That willingness is to allow the Holy Spirit to correct my thinking, I have to let go of my own ego thoughts, and allow the Holy Spirit to replace them with the Thoughts of God. And by allowing the Holy Spirit to heal my mind, I forget the errors of the ego, and live in the Peace of God. How long does that take? It can happen in an instant!!!! But that instant will not come until I have learned to listen only to the Voice for God. If I listen only to the Voice for God, I will not be listening to my own thoughts? What am I without my thoughts? Listening to God’s Voice puts me into the knowing mind. This is different than the “right mind” which is really the ego mind choosing to be guided by the Holy Spirit.
T-3.IV.4. Right-mindedness is not to be confused with the knowing mind, because it is applicable only to right perception. 2 You can be right-minded or wrong-minded, and even this is subject to degrees, clearly demonstrating that knowledge is not involved. 3 The term “right-mindedness” is properly used as the correction for “wrong-mindedness,” and applies to the state of mind that induces accurate perception. 4 It is miracle-minded because it heals misperception, and this is indeed a miracle in view of how you perceive yourself.
So – even though I am not totally right minded, and only beginning to think with the “knowing mind”, my willingness is making it possible to truly change my mind.
T-7.VII.10. You are the Will of God. 2 Do not accept anything else as your will, or you are denying what you are. 3 Deny this and you will attack, believing you have been attacked. 4 But see the Love of God in you, and you will see it everywhere because it is everywhere. 5 See His abundance in everyone, and you will know that you are in Him with them. 6 They are part of you, as you are part of God. 7 You are as lonely without understanding this as God Himself is lonely when His Sons do not know Him. 8 The peace of God is understanding this. 9 There is only one way out of the world’s thinking, just as there was only one way into it. 10 Understand totally by understanding totality.
T-7.VII.11. Perceive any part of the ego’s thought system as wholly insane, wholly delusional and wholly undesirable, and you have correctly evaluated all of it. 2 This correction enables you to perceive any part of creation as wholly real, wholly perfect and wholly desirable. 3 Wanting this only you will have this only, and giving this only you will be only this.
THE TIPPING POINT FOR THE WORLD IS WHEN I HEAR THE VOICE FOR GOD.
Now that I have gone so far I can’t turn back – I have reached the POINT OF NO RETURN!!! It’s like the trip to the top of the roller coaster – all of the work has been done in the first 50%. At 51% is the instant of release and it is a wild and exciting ride after that. Although I am still being constantly vigilant for God and His Kingdom, I know I am on the right side of the curve, the down side of the roller coaster. And I can now, happily, enjoy the ride!!!